I Was Incapable Of Parenting According To My Values

When we first connected, I had a vision of the parent I wanted to be but kept finding myself parenting in a way that didn't align with my values. I couldn't understand why I was incapable of parenting according to my values all of the time and worst of all, I felt unable to change this.

I had high expectations of coaching with Lavinia because of Janet Lansbury’s recommendation but I was very skeptical about inner child work. Reparenting my inner child felt very intangible and bohemian, whereas I'm very Type A and logical.

In addition to this, I knew that I should be doing more self-care in theory, but I assumed that meant squeezing in the big stuff - a day out with friends, horseback riding once a year, a vacation without kids.

I now see the importance of micro-dosing self-care every single day and not just leaving it to the infrequent, huge things.

Lastly, I now recognize when my own needs aren't being met and know that if my needs aren't being met, this directly correlates to not having the self-control I need in order to parent in a way that aligns with my values.

I surprised myself the most during the series with the realization that I have an inner child, and that she was in a lot of pain that I was ignoring.

The childhood memories that came up throughout our time together shocked me, because I had completely locked them away and forgotten about them - it blows my mind how many tears there were for things I didn't even remember the week before I started coaching.

I am so deeply thankful for Lavinia and feel genuinely enlightened by the work we did together.

I now feel much more peace around my childhood and especially around how I need to reframe the relationship with my mother.

~ Alicia Marie, national director & mama, USA