I Knew How To Be Better But Couldn’t Do It In The Moment

When we first connected, I was feeling out of control with regards to my reactions to my kids - like I knew how to be better but couldn’t do it in the moment. I had a lot of anger inside me and didn’t understand how to process my emotions, past or present; I had a really hard time being present and being in my body, and the thing I was desperate for support with, was to how to change – how to be a more sturdy mom to my kids and no longer feel like I was constantly failing.

I had never worked with a coach before and was very hopeful that this experience would be healing – it was. I knew that Lavinia would provide me with the guidance and feedback that I felt was lacking in traditional therapy.

Since coaching, my life has improved in so many ways. I feel more in control of my behavior and while I’m not perfect, I now meet my imperfections with so much more compassion rather than with a spiral of self-hatred. Now, if the spiral starts, I can stop it, and I’m able to choose how to respond to my kids’ tricky behavior instead of letting them trigger me.

My feelings towards my parents have also shifted and I’ve let go of a lot of resentment I had. I now feel more confident in prioritizing my needs and in asking for support when I need it.

I surprised myself the most during the coaching series, by how much I have changed. I feel like I peeled off a layer of myself that was no longer serving me and found a more authentic self underneath.

My biggest learning was that my inner child was in control of most of my life. I learned how to listen to her and how to talk to her/myself as a loving inner parent. And whilst it felt so weird at first, what’s amazing is that it’s become totally normal and comforting to me now - I have learnt self-compassion.

The coaching series felt like a really unique and incredible opportunity to be able to work one-on-one with Lavinia. I felt myself change faster than I imagined was possible and I don’t think traditional therapy would have brought me to this place, ever. It was absolutely good value and worth everything I put into it!

I’m really grateful to Lavinia for creating the safest place for me to be my most honest and vulnerable self. Her honesty and realness is what drew me to her when I first heard her interviewed on Unruffled podcast, and I came back to that episode multiple times when I felt like I was failing at being the mom I wanted to be.

I just knew that she was the person who could help me and she did, so much - so many wounds have healed. I’m so much stronger because of our work together and Lavinia gave me tools that I will use for the rest of my life.

~ Rebecca Yates, mama, USA